Lilac Colored Glasses

My song for today is a favorite for several reasons. First, I just love Matchbox 20. I’ve loved them ever since I heard “Push” on MTV circa 1997 off their debut album Yourself or Someone Like You. Hearing “Real World” reminds me of driving home from my very first job (Long John Silver’s, yeah I know, what teenager wants to work at a place where you leave stinking of fried fish, but I was proud of the fact that I was working and I rocked the late night drive through man…I’d've been teller of the month a lot more if skill was valued over a vacant smile). The song “Bed of Lies” off of Mad Season makes me remember the agony following my first serious break up. The song that I’m sharing with you today is “Unwell” from their album More Than You Think You Are. This one makes me think of my best and closest friend from college. We’ll call her Daffodil.

Daffodil and I were nearly inseparable during my 4th and 5th years of school and we ended up in all sorts of crazy situations and embroiled in so many kinds of debauchery. We’ve agreed, several times, that some of the best times of our lives took place on our roadtrips together. Usually said excursions revolved around the fraternity brothers of the boyfriend I told you about in this post. There was one trip in particular, a drive from Indiana, PA to Deep Creek, MD in which we must have heard this song at least twice an hour (that’s like 10 times going one way). We were so damn sick of it and no matter what station we found, “Unwell” would end up playing (the CD player was broken or we’d have made a road trip mix or something). It will always remind me of that trip; my green Pontiac Sunfire (the air conditoning was busted too so we had to keep the wondows rolled down to avoid broiling ourselves) packed with a trunkload of apple pucker, whiskey, a carton of Marlboro Lights and some other material that I won’t mention, but suffice it to say it wasn’t what you would call “legal”, the two of us laughing hysterically over old times, anxious for the new adventure around the bend.

It was an amazing time of my life. Were we crazy? Unwell? Yes, I think we were in some ways. We insisited on learning our life lessons in the hardest, most painful ways possible. But having someone along for that full tilt, headlong sprint into the unknown was a blessing. And I think about it often.

Unwell - Matchbox 20

All day staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on
Feeling like I’m headed for a breakdown
And I don’t know why

But I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell
I know right now you can’t tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you’ll see
A different side of me
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little impaired
I know right now you don’t care
But soon enough you’re gonna think of me
And how I used to be…me

I’m talking to myself in public
Dodging glances on the train
And I know, I know they’ve all been talking about me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong with me
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow I’ve lost my mind

But I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell
I know right now you can’t tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you’ll see
A different side of me
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little impaired
I know right now you don’t care
But soon enough you’re gonna think of me
And how I used to be

I’ve been talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they’ll come to get me
Yeah, they’re taking me away

But I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell
I know right now you can’t tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you’ll see
A different side of me
I’m not crazy, I’m just a little impaired
I know right now you don’t care
But soon enough you’re gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Yeah, how I used to be
How I used to be
Well, I’m just a little unwell
How I used to be
How I used to be
I’m just a little unwell

This is also in response to David’s Weekend Wandering question: What brings tears to your eyes?

Related posts:

1. Music Monday – Cloud Cult
2. Music Monday – Music From The Lowlands Part Deux
3. Music Monday – Music From The Lowlands
4. Music Monday – Memorial Day
5. Music Monday – The Beauty of Grey
6. Music Monday – Two Sides of the Same Coin
7. Music Monday – Great Big Sea
8. Music Monday, or A Lot of Talk About Wine